The unprofessional professional
Let’s be honest, I’m not particularly good at this whole ‘professional author’ gig. The truth is, I’m not entirely sure I am one anyway, and I certainly won’t feel like I’m cresting that little hill until I hold my book in my hands. As I write this, my debut novel should have been out for four days (by the original plan) but due to some jiggery-pokery at my wonderful publishers, we have another few months to wait. So here I am, filling time until the release, wondering what it is ‘professional authors’ even do.
Apparently, author photographs are a thing… so I had a crack at that. All I can say is thank god for my mate, Pam, who is a(n actual professional) photographer because holy hell, I was not a professional photographee (is that even a word?)
This all came about because I started interacting in little ‘author worlds’ with people who actually are authors and they all had spanky shiny photographs on their various profiles. I, on the other hand, have a profile pic in which I’m a bit hammered and halfway down a Long Island Iced Tea… and a website ‘logo’ that looks like two deformed pigeons playing hide and seek (and with missing legs!) The publishers website looks like they’ve invited the works experience kid to play along with them… so we did something about it.
Pam is a legend. There’s a whole history there that I won’t go into but suffice to say, a few Sundays ago Pam and her lovely family rocked up at our place with all the gear and we had a blast. I’d cheekily asked Pam if she had a rock star kind of ‘rider’ – you know, requests for food and beer etc – she replied with ‘pulled lamb sliders, craft beer and purple MnMs’.
The only thing I couldn’t find was purple MnMs!
We had a ball! We drank craft beer, we ate sliders, and Pam worked her magic while I continued to drink and take the piss… because I am the unprofessional professional.
Last week, I got a batch of photographs through from Pam and despite the subject matter being me, they’re really fun. This is batch one of two. Pretty soon I’m going to have to pick which ones I’m going to use for where. Any suggestions?
(You can check out Pam’s amazing work at https://www.pjbphotography.com.au/)
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Before The Book and the Blade
I wrote six books before I started work on The Book and the Blade. They were not great. One, two and three were terrible in fact. Four showed some small promise but floundered (drowned) in the middle. Five was a present for my kids that I’m still happy with, and six was a silly thing … Continue reading Before The Book and the Blade →
Where have you been?
Years ago I ploughed my way through Frank McCourt’s books because one of my students was reading Angela’s Ashes and raving about it in class, so I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. I read the same book, loved it, and decided to read everything else he had written as well. Somewhere … Continue reading Where have you been? →
Halloween Hearth Stories 2020
I wrote a thing for the Halloween Hearth Stories hosted by Parliament House Press. This weekend and next they are publishing a selection of creepy/spooky/Halloweeny short stories from some of their authors (that’s me, Mum!) and my story is online now for you to have a gander at. I’ll come clean, I cheated a bit. … Continue reading Halloween Hearth Stories 2020 →
I had the idea for The Book and the Blade nearly 20 years ago and it hurts me to write that! When I was 18 I started University in York and one of the drawcards for the city was the rumoured 365 pubs… one for every day of the year. There’s a famous street called … Continue reading The Idea →
In the beginning… 31/1/19 I started writing the York ghost story last night… finally! I’m not entirely convinced by the tone yet and it’s a bit cliched but I’m happy I’ve started. The characters are taking shape and I have an idea of where the story is heading. It feels so good to write fiction … Continue reading The Start →