Book release, book shops, book launch, and talking bollocks – my week after publication

Well, what a week it has been! My second novel, The Sword and the Hounds, was published on the 23rd of July and got shared around a bit on social media by some amazing and lovely people, though from my end, it wasn’t quite the all-singing, all-dancing affair I had in mind… largely due to my youngest kid being a bit unwell. I had every intention of doing… something, but the day itself sort of went by in a bit of a blur. I walked the dog as I normally do, talked some bollocks on TikTok as I normally do, replied to some lovely messages, got ready for work… and didn’t go.

So, it’s book publication day, you find yourself off work because your boy is poorly, what would you do? That’s right… I spent the entire day sitting in front of a fire, editing a novel, and making plans to self-publish at Halloween, but that’s a different story for a different time (literally). Back to the week that was…

MY BOOK IS PUBLISHED!

I am absolutely over the moon, although I’m still yet to receive my six-figure contract and movie deal, which is a bit strange. I think the postman might have lost it.

I am, however, eternally grateful for the amazing support I have from family and friends… and some lovely people I’ve only ever ‘met’ online. The Sword and the Hounds has been really well received… by those able to get access to it. Because that has been a nightmare!

You may have heard that Booktopia (the biggest online book shop in Australia) collapsed and Amazon pounced on that news in the only way Amazon knows how… by cranking the price of small press and indie books in the Australian marketplace. That was gutting… to see my little novel priced so high and knowing what that means. And there’s nothing I can do about it. My lovely publisher was just as shocked as me. So, I spent the first few days after publication trying to find anywhere that might sell my novel and not rip people off. Thankfully, there are a great number of really cool independent bookshops who have the book listed online so all was not lost.

And then… drum roll… W.H. Smith listed it on their website! I was gobsmacked! Smiths is an institution of the British high street! I boasted all over the place about that one… and then it got taken down! I have no idea why. It came, it went, it came back again, my sister ordered it, it went again. Whether or not my sis ever gets her hands on the book remains to be seen! (sorry).

But speaking of Smiths… I got talking to the manager of the branch in Richmond (where the book is set) and he is going to try and get it on the shelves there. THAT is amazing! I told my mam (I was ‘fizzing up and busting’ as she likes to say) and she told her friends… the wonderful ‘Stray ladies’ (best not to ask). One lovely lady, Janice, even went to look, bless her, but it was only a few days after publication and not in stock. I don’t know if that one will eventuate… but if it does, I’ll be begging people to take photos of my book on the shelf! That will be a dream come true.

After that, I spent a good few hours (and god-knows how much on the phone bill) calling other UK bookshops… with zero success. One guy told me he receives between 3-4 thousand requests a month! That’s insane… and a bit of a kick in the tits… but I guess I can’t feel too bad about it.

On day three, the Kindle version of The Sword and the Hounds climbed the charts in ‘Ghost Horror’ on the Australian market and hung around number 3 for a very short while… that was utter magic, and so I made a load more phone calls trying to ride on the coattails of that momentary success… again, no luck 😀

On day four or five, my Goodreads account got hacked… or a gremlin was let loose, I don’t know. It was a bit of struggle getting that sorted, but when I did (thanks to the wonderful ‘librarians’ at Goodreads) I found some reviews sitting there for the new book! 2 x 5 star and 1 x 4 star! Magic!

My lovely (and patient) wife organised a book launch and I sent the wrong date out to everyone at work. I then sent them all another email with the correct date. And then a few days later I cancelled the whole thing. To tell the truth, I don’t really know why. I think the first one was such a huge moment for me that I got into my own head a bit. Maybe something more low key might be in order this time round. We’ll see.

So, what else have I been up to? Well, I’ve spent countless hours trying to create ads for the book but all I’ve really ended up doing is scrolling through photos and videos of our time in Richmond and Yorkshire and giving myself crippling homesickness. That then leads to thoughts of moving back, which leads to thoughts of finances, which leads to thoughts of ‘well, if I sell a million books I won’t have to worry about it, I can just wander around Yorkshire like the next James Herriot’, which leads to thoughts of ‘you’re a dickhead’, so I distract myself with the Olympics, which leads to thoughts of ‘am I really this old?’. It’s quite the roller coaster.

BUT THEN I got in touch with an absolute legend on Instagram… one of my favourite accounts… and my publisher sent him my books! That’s exciting, and more than a little scary. Details to follow soon.

A few days ago, I had an interview with a lovely reporter for a local paper, which was fantastic. I haven’t really mentioned that to anyone (until now). I’m just going to see what happens when the paper gets put on the table in the staff room. I’ll keep you posted.

And over the last few days, those friends and family who ordered the book have started to receive it in the post and my inbox now has some cracking photos of The Sword and the Hounds out in the world… and like a crack-whore looking for a fix, I want more! So, I’ve been writing. And then I realise I’m ignoring advertising, so I go back to that, and I end up ignoring the writing and I get nothing done at all, and… , blimey, it’s noisy in here! Thank God for the Olympics and All Creatures Great and Small.

So, here we are… a week or so later trying not to metaphorically peer over everyone’s shoulder to see if they love or hate my book (and therefore, tacitly, me)…like some right needy dickhead! But there is a part in this story I just can’t wait for folk to read… especially those who read the first book and told me they liked a particularly character… something happens!

BLANK comes BLANK as a BLANK and BLANK BLANK BLANK.

If you crack my code, hit me up, I want to talk about it!

Thanks for reading folks! And thank you all for an awesome week.

The Sword and the Hounds… OUT NOW!

The Sword and the Hounds – the who, what, when, where and why?

Tomorrow is the 23rd of July 2024 and the day my second novel will be released into the wild. To say I’m a little nervous would be an understatement, but I am also very excited. Quite a few people read The Book and the Blade (the first in the Arthur Crazy series) and the reviews are (mostly) positive… except for one bloke who took exception to the fact the main character smokes too much and drinks too much. I mean, that’s kind of the point, but reader spaces are for readers, not for writers. He is absolutely entitled to his opinion. But I digress. I wonder if he’ll read what happens next? Probably not.

The Sword and the Hounds follows directly on from the events of The Book and the Blade and tells the story after the story, so to speak. If The Book and the Blade was about Arthur getting to grips with an ability to communicate with the deceased, The Sword and the Hounds is about him coming to terms with the wider implications that the dead (and assorted bit n bobs n beasts) exist in the first place. It is the hangover after the big night out. There are… injuries. There are… gaps.

I wrote The Sword and the Hounds when we lived in York in 2019… just before COVID hit. If nothing else, it is a love-letter to the town of Richmond and the folklore of Yorkshire. As one of the characters expresses…

It’s Yorkshire. We’re all a little pagan around here.

But really it exists because I fell in love with Arthur and I fell in love with writing. Something clicked in me when I wrote The Book and the Blade and I knew I’d never look back. Even if they never see the light of day and no one reads them, I’ll never stop writing these stories. I’m not sure I can. Full disclosure… there are four complete Arthur novels, two complete tie-in novels, one obscure novel ‘set in the same world’, a script for a graphic novel, a half-written plan for the fifth, and a series of random notes for the sixth and seventh. If you’re along for the ride… it’s a long one… and it’s going to get bumpy! I hope you enjoy it!

But therein lies the rub… Amazon are not making it easy for people (mainly in Australia) to access my books. The price is astronomical and there is nothing my publisher and I can do about it… other than direct you elsewhere.

That’s the who (me), the what (The Sword and the Hounds), and the when (tomorrow) taken care of so now for the ‘where‘.

In a perfect world… your local independent bookshop. The more mysterious and confusing (and possibly a little creepy) the better. One of those old type of bookshops that vanishes like the emporium in the movie, Gremlins. You know what I mean… with corridors and stairs and hidden rooms that will eat you given half a chance. You go in aged 21 and come out with white hair and a sack full of books. Perfect. But if you don’t have one of them… please try my publisher… Parliament House Press. They distribute worldwide.

If you’re in Brisbane, I know Books@Stones have copies of The Book and the Blade in stock… and if they’re still there this time next week they’ll be signed (if they let me scribble in them) and they also have an online listing for The Sword and the Hounds. You’ll be able to order it in and support a local business at the same time. And THAT is the why! Galactic Overlord Bezos can’t have everything, surely!

Any local bookshop should be able to order The Sword and the Hounds… and in a perfect world, if enough people do, they might consider a permanent stock.

One last note for those in the U.K. – – – and this made me do a little happy dance. W.H. Smiths have an online listing for The Sword and the Hounds! That is an absolute dream come true for me! I loved shopping in Smiths when I was a kid (and an adult!) and the thought that you can order my book and pop in to pick it up is the stuff of “pinch-me-I’m-dreaming” fantasy. And I think it all has to do with one dude… the manager of Smiths in Richmond. He was really keen to get the book on the shelf and so we chatted a bit and he took my details. I called him yesterday to say thanks when I noticed the online listing (horrifyingly getting his surname wrong because I’m a forgetful nobhead) and, bizarrely, he said he wasn’t sure it was him. He has begun discussion with head office but couldn’t remember if he’d passed on my name or the name of the book. So… I reckon it is him… it must be… but if it isn’t, that means my little book got on the list at Smith organically. Which is also exceptionally cool. But I include this little anecdote because it illustrates something really important that hits every part of who, what, when, where, and why… every aspect of what I might call success has been achieved thanks to other people. People who read, who support, who encourage, who advise, who critique, and even people who tell me my characters smoke too much.

So, I’ll end this by saying a very heartfelt thank you to you all. If you’re reading this, I have no doubt that I owe you a debt of gratitude. Thank you!

Here’s looking forward to tomorrow and all the days after!

Cheers!

(I promise not to be too needy and metaphorically read over your shoulder over the coming weeks. Well, I’ll try really hard!)

The best bad review

Let me preface this by saying reviews are for readers, not for writers. As much as we needy pen-pushers are desperate for them and exceedingly grateful anytime a person takes the time to write a few words about our books, it’s not really our space to be in. Once a book is out in the wild, it no longer belongs to the author. Reviews are designed to inform other readers about a person’s thoughts and opinions on a book, and whether or not they believe it is worth picking up. The author has no control over that and nor should they.

A little caveat here, there is a trend in some circles of the indie book world to tag authors in negative reviews, and I’ve even seen some reviewers demand authors change aspects of the novel in certain ways because “it’ll be better”. Please don’t do that. That’s a dick move. Once the book is out there, it’s out there. For better or worse.

And that brings me to the point of this little blog post. As much as I firmly believe in what I wrote above, I am also one of those needy pen-pushers desperate for validation and you better believe I’ve read every single review of everything I’ve ever written.

It’s a sort of Catch-22 narcissism. Who’d be a writer, right?

First of all, thank you! Thank you so much to every single person who has read my stuff, and an extra special thanks with a cherry on the top if you left a review… it means the world to me, but I want to talk about the worst review I got. No, not the one that simply said “do not read this.” That one was magic! This was a review that went into a bit more detail.

Essentially, the reviewer didn’t think the book was funny, and that’s his prerogative. It kind of reminds me of Jimmy Carr when someone heckled, “when does the comedy start?” It’s all subjective, if you don’t think something is funny then it isn’t. And that’s unfortunate. As Jimmy said, “you’ve paid the price, bought the ticket, you didn’t like it, you’ve had a disaster. Life is unfair.” Or something like that. I can’t fault that. But then the reviewer went on to say that the main character, Arthur, is a heavy drinker and smoker and therefore not really deserving of sympathy, and again, that’s totally fair. But to me, that’s the whole point of Arthur, and indeed, the whole point of much of what I write.

I love putting ordinary people into extraordinary circumstances and seeing how they handle it.

Arthur isn’t supposed to be sympathetic. He’s a bit of a nob, really. He’s selfish in many ways and he has a lot of vices. He’s definitely narcissistic and yes, he drinks too much, and smokes too much, but he is just a man, and like all men, he is actually still the same confused little boy he always was, just trapped now in a man’s body in a supposedly adult world. Arthur is a man who finds himself suddenly surrounded by ghosts, and demons, and utterly bizarre circumstances when all he really wants to do is have a Cajun Chicken Panini and go home.

SPOILERS

At the end of The Book and the Blade, after Arthur’s world has gone completely tits up, he goes running home to his mum and dad… and that’s where The Sword and the Hounds comes in. The sequel, due for publication on the 23rd July by the lovely people at Parliament House Press, finds Arthur still living at home six months later and trying to make sense of the world. Does he still drink too much? Does he still smoke too much? Is he still a bit of a dick? Well, you’ll have to wait and see. But the dead aren’t done with him yet so hopefully he’s learned a thing or two.

There are a total of four Arthur books (and I’m working on more) and if he was the same in all of them I think it would be a bit boring because that’s not how life works. He should grow, he should develop and mature, but also, he’s bound to relapse and fall into old habits occasionally, right? After all, he is just an ordinary bloke trying his best.

Like all of us, really.

So, thank you to the reviewer for reading The Book and the Blade and taking the time to leave a review. I’m sorry it wasn’t really for you, but you can’t win them all.

And here’s to everyone who read it and enjoyed it… thank you… with cherries on top!

Strap in… there’s a lot more to come!

Cheers,

_{Oh, and if you’re interested, I also waffle on about this sort of stuff over on TikTok. I know, it’s a young person’s game over there, but it’s really just me talking shit while walking my dog.}

@alexfinlaysonauthor
dog walks, book reviews, and thoughts on the main character #TheBookandtheBlade #booktok #TheSwordandtheHounds #books #bookreviews #writerlife #newbook
♬ original sound – ABFinlayson

Why I write

I don’t often get asked why I write as people seem to be more curious about how. This isn’t a query regarding methodology or anything, they’re not looking for a pen or pencil, typewriter or keyboard kind of response, moreso a ‘where on earth do you find the time?’ That’s a fair question, but I think why is much better.

*insert needlessly melodramatic and intense lean forward, hand on chin, probably wearing a beret and looking like a twat moment here*

“I write because I have to”

(yeah, I definitely set myself to dickhead there, but bear with me)

My mind is like a bag of cats on nitrous oxide who are completely aware there’s a brick in the bottom and possibly a near future that involves water and isn’t very long. Even my intrusive thoughts have intrusive thoughts. And I don’t say this lightly. My wife tells me I overthink things other people don’t even think about. Although I should point out this came from a lovely moment of kindness … talking to the kids … “Your dad is the most fair man there is. He overthinks things I don’t even think of”. She’s the Chilli to my Bandit. Anyway, I just assumed everyone’s heads are this busy. As it turns out… some people don’t even have an inner monologue!

Mental. I have about four. And they’re all set to 11.

But I can drown it out. There are ways.

There’s the not-so-healthy mind-numbing scrolling through social media, there’s the definitely-not-so-healthy partaking of ample amounts of booze, there’s the actually-healthy-but-I’m-too-fucking-lazy god-awful exercise, and then there’s stories.

When I get into a story it’s damn near all I can focus on. I can dedicate myself to it… and yes, become slightly obsessed with it. But shaping a story, shaping characters, watching them grow and do things I didn’t expect, even though I’m supposed to be in charge… that’s magic. And then the rare occasion of eliciting a response from a reader… that’s an extra special kind of magic right there.

A lady wrote me a beautiful message this time last year complaining about a character I’d killed. Steve. (Spoilers, sorry). It upset her. The email was lovely. She was lovely. But what utter magic to have written something that can make people feel… to cry, laugh, get angry, scared, a little bit nervous about the kind of man they’ve married and got two kids with 🤣

When I’m writing, even the intrusive thoughts stop squabbling for a bit and pitch in with ideas.

So, how I write is whenever I can, wherever I can, on my laptop or in my notebook.

But why I write is because I have to.

It gives me an amazing sense of well-being, peace, and fulfillment. And there is something utterly magic about creating a story that didn’t exist before. It’s even more magic if those stories get shared… but that’s not the be all and end all. I have five complete novels and two novellas that haven’t been published or signed, and maybe they never will… but writing them was a dream. And so I’ll keep writing.

Okay, maybe it’s not because I have to… maybe that’s going too far… but it is healthier than falling down an angry rabbit hole watching tiktok videos of Karens arguing with the police.

If I write about the angry Karens… well, I can set the barghests and demons on them.

😁

Thanks for reading.

If you’re a writer, I’d love to know why.

Cheers,

Aaaaand done… maybe

Well, it only took me the better part of 30 years, but I finished writing a novel today. To be clear, I haven’t been writing for 30 years, but when I tell the story of The Book and the Blade, I always mention how I initially got the idea when I was 18.

For this story, I’ve had the idea since I was 8! Today, I finished it.

To give this a little context, I couldn’t even read when I was 8, but my grandad had died two years prior and like many young boys in similar circumstances, I idolised him in ways I didn’t fully understand.

My grandad; the dog walking, pipe smoking, ever present war hero… was gone.

But his stories live on.

No one is finally dead until the ripples they cause in the world fade away.
Sir Terry Pratchett – Reaper Man

I’m 42 years old now, I live in Australia, and I tell my grandad’s stories constantly. It was about time I wrote them down. I carry his name, you see, passed down to me through my dad, his son. My own daughter and son carry his name also, and the shared names go back even further than those four generations.

But back to the point of this post, I finally finished writing a novel about him. Sgt. Alexander Bedair Finlayson.

Maybe.

I first announced I’d done this on 22nd October 2023… that was the day I completed the first draft. On the 6th April 2024 (two days before writing this) I finished… again.

I think.

View this post on Instagram

The tricky thing about writing a novel about your grandad, when you’re named after him, is you can’t very well use your own name as that of the main protagonist. This isn’t primary school. And to make it even more complicated, I have used grandad’s name in another of my novels. He was a twin. And in the upcoming The Sword and the Hounds, Alexander and Archibald play a key role. So, I sort of shot myself in the foot there.

But the reality is, for some strange reason I don’t quite know, Uncle Arch used to refer to himself as Mickie Finn. When he wrote letters to grandad during the war, he often signed them in this way. So my main character, the one based on grandad, became Michael ‘Micky’ Finn. His brother in the story is called John (another name that runs through the family)… and strangely enough, Alexander and Archibald make an appearance as well.

You might be thinking now… if you’re of a deductive mind… that these few details would indicate I am playing fast and loose with ‘historical fiction’, and you’d be absolutely spot on. This story isn’t historical fiction, not really, it’s historical fantasy, and there’s a very simple explanation…

I’m a coward.

The truth is, I don’t feel good enough to write a straight war story about my grandad. I don’t think I could ever do it justice. I know I can string a few word together and occasionally pop out some entertaining bits and bobs, but this is my grandad we’re talking about! A man who left home just after his 21st birthday in 1939 to enter basic training, and was then shipped out a year later from Liverpool to North Africa. He wouldn’t return home for four and a half years! He fought in North Africa, Italy, Greece, and ended up in the LRDG! How the hell am I supposed to write about that?!

So I didn’t. I spoke to my dad, and I spoke to my uncle, and I basically asked for their blessing to write grandad’s story in a way I know how… with fantasy and horror. And it was this that ultimately made me throw out the first draft… and then it saved the fifth.

I started by moulding the story around Grandad’s Letters (these documents are fully deserving of the capitalisation). They are two long accounts of grandad’s experiences in war that he typed up for Major Forty, who wrote a series of books on the exploits of the 8th Army and the 7th Armoured Division. We have those letters, along with a treasure trove of photographs taken through the North Africa Campaign and beyond. I organised everything as best as I could in chronological order and then I started playing with it.

View this post on Instagram

But there were too many influences. When I first started, I didn’t know what I wanted it to be. I devoured A.R. Channel’s The Fighting Four war novels when I was a kid, then moved up to Robert Westall. After that were Stephen E Ambrose and Ben McIntyre. I’ve watched just about every war movie and TV show you can imagine, from the romanticised movies of the 60s and 70s to the more gritty and realistic showings of Spielberg, Hanks and co. and I’m one of those blokes who is more than happy to watch a documentary on a Friday night (yes, I am that cliched). And, my God, I researched! I researched more for this novel than I did for my Masters.

@alexfinlaysonauthor
I posted this video two years ago on an old account I’ve lost access to. just found it again. #booktok #writing #amwriting #ww2 #northafricacampaign #tobruk #desertrats #8tharmy
♬ original sound – ABFinlayson

But still, that first draft didn’t know whether it was coming or going! Was it aimed at kids, teens, war historians, or horror fans? It was a total mess… and the ‘horror’ was shoe-horned in to try and make the narrative flow. It didn’t work.

In the second draft, I found the voice and tone I wanted.

In the third, I discovered the plot (three drafts to find a plot!)

In the fourth, I ‘killed my darlings’, as the saying goes (and I’m left with a whole file called ‘dumping ground’)

And in the fifth, I found my story. Grandad’s story.

The tentative working title is Shadows in the Sand, but that might change. Right now, I’m exhausted. I’ve spoken to dad. I’ve spoken to my best mate. I’ve spoken to my wife. I’ve come out from under the rock and I’m going to let it rest. What the story needs now is fresh eyes… someone who can see if it works like a story at all.

The beta reading of this one is going to be brutal! I’m not sure I’m ready to let it go.

Either way, I did it. And I’m really proud I did it. Who knows… it might work, it might not. But I’ll push on regardless.

Cheers,

Last days of the sale…

The Book and the Blade is on sale over on Amazon, ladies and gents. For the rest of the month (admittedly, not long) it will only cost a few dollars/pounds. So, now is the perfect time to have a little read of my comedy/horror about a drunk loner who sees dead people… because the sequel comes out soon!

There are currently four books in the Arthur Crazy series, with the second, The Sword and the Hounds, slated for the end of July… and there is even a chance that the third, The Saint and the Shadowman, will hit the shelves before the end of the year! Fingers crossed!

After that… well, things get a little odd. The Arthur Crazy series was originally a trilogy, but then the fourth seemed to come from nowhere, and… it’s a bit different. The fourth novel is called, I Draw the Line at ******* Vampires, and I had so much fun writing it.

Now my silly brain is even working on the fifth! Nothing is on paper yet, apart from a smattering of notes on Google Keep and one or two post-its shoved in a diary, but I have this ridiculous plan where all my books tie together in one glorious whole!

And with that, here are the links for The Book and the Blade should it strike your fancy…

Australia – $2.92 United Kingdom – £1.49 USA – $1.99 Canada – $1.99

Cheers folks,

All the best,

Al.

The First One of 2024

Good morning lovely people, and welcome to a random and unexpected blog post… my first of 2024, and let’s be honest, my first in a long time. This poor neglected little website does not get a whole lot of attention and I really ought to remedy that.

So, let’s recap 2023:

Reindeer Games did quite well in the Christmas of 2022 and so the start of 2023 saw a number of lovely reviews finding their way onto Amazon and Goodreads. That was awesome, and I’m incredibly grateful to everyone who read and supported my silly little Reindeer murdery self-published novella.
The Book and the Blade was released by Parliament House Press! My debut novel! A dream come true.
The book launch took place at Netherworld in Brisbane on my 41st birthday and we had an absolute ball! I met some amazing people there, including some lovely members of the Brisbane Writers Crew.
I actually managed to get to a couple of Brisbane Writers Crew catch-ups, which were great, but my attendance was pretty poor at best (not a fan of driving in the city!) I’ll attempt to fix that in 2024.
Albert the Great Australian Dragon – illustrated by the wonderfully talented Amy Carter was published at Easter.
The publisher who had signed Rock Zombie sadly pulled the plug (well… stopped being a publisher altogether!)
Book shop appearance at the excellent Highlands Books in Emerald!
Wrote two stories (and narrated them!) for Pleased! A Beatles inspired anthology edited by the awesome Gayle Ramage.
Had two stories published in the amazing Australian horror anthology, Nightmare Fuel, courtesy of the wonderful Emma Nayfie.
The opening chapter of my comedy/fantasy novel, Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Orcs?! was read out by the exceptional lads of The Failing Writers Podcast.
My Christmas ghost story, In The House of Trembling Madness, was also read out in the Christmas special of the same pod, thanks lads!
Impromptu book signing at Book Face Orion, Springfield!
Reindeer Games 2: Rein Harder with a Vengeance was released for Christmas and did quite well… though not as well as Reindeer Games 1 (for the second year running!)
The Sword and the Hounds cover reveal!
And I wrote three novels, two novellas, seven short stories, submitted to publishers twenty-one times, got four acceptances (short stories), twelve rejections, and radio silence from the rest…oh, and you know, went to work and earned a living and whatnot (plus moved house…and got bitten by a snake…and went through a tornado…but I did get a full size pool table for next to nothing so happy days!)

Damn. That’s a big year. So, what’s next?

Well, The Sword and the Hounds will be published in April, so I’m very much looking forward to that. If Rock Zombie doesn’t find a home by the middle of the year I’ve decided to self-publish it for Halloween. I wrote myself into a corner with Reindeer Games, so I’m going to have to write Reindeer Games 3: Sleigh by December. I’m also working on a series of Easter stories in the same vein, but that’ll be for 2025. This year I want to finish writing the ‘unnamed WW2’ novel I’ve had on the go for a year, create an Arthur Crazy graphic novel tie-in (to further explain an event that happens in The Sword and the Hounds), and get started on Arthur Crazy #5. I’d also like to find homes for The Dragoman and Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Orcs?! So, you know, nothing crazy 😀

Thanks for reading, folks!

The Reality of Being an International, Bestselling, Award-Winning Author!

*I’m from England, I live in Australia, and my publisher is American. By default, I have sold books to an international market!

**For one moment of one day, the digital sales of my book got to Number 2 in a very specific category.

***Entirely fictional…I just wanted to use the ‘rule of three’ in the title. It looks better.

So, the reality then, because that’s what we’re left with…is that nothing much has changed at all. In fact, to paraphrase Arnold Rimmer, the thought occurs that we haven’t budged a smegging inch! Well, that’s what it feels like. I know I have a book out there. Two in fact. Three if you include novellas. Four if you include anthologies. But life trundles on as it ever did. Not for me the rabid auctioning off of my rights to the highest bidder…I’m just going to work, doing what I always do, and complaining about not having the time or energy to do what I want to do…what I love. Because I love writing stories. And I want people to read them and to get some semblance of entertainment from them. But lately there has been a little misconception doing the rounds among some family, friends, and acquaintances. It’s quite funny actually, but I think it’s about time I set the record straight, because the misconception, bizarrely, is that I’ve made it! (Whatever that means!)

I’ll admit, from a distance, it might look pretty cool. I released a book, lots of people came to the launch, I did a little happy dance about selling out every copy, then I did a bookshop signing and the same thing happened there, and then I bleated all over social media about the charts, then I bought a guitar (with my earnings), and then we moved house and now live on acreage with the most ridiculous views.

So, I can see the problem. From the outside, it does look kind of impressive, but the other day someone asked me if I was going to quit work and for the life of me I couldn’t figure out why.

They thought I was rich!

I laughed so hard I nearly shat! (super special brownie points to anyone who knows this gross but excellent reference).

The reality is I’ve sold a few hundred books, made a few hundred dollars (I get 10% or so of physical sales, it’s not a lot), the guitar was dirt cheap, and we moved house because we’re romantic idiots with more passion than sense.

But there is another side to this somewhat narcissistic tale. I am, indeed, an international, best-selling, award-winning author! Well, two out of three isn’t bad. But I did write a book or two. People have bought them, read them, enjoyed them, and reviewed them. And for one brief shining moment, this happened…

View this post on Instagram

But more than that, I’ve had the most lovely messages from friends and complete strangers, and I’ve made friends because of writing.

Then just last week, I spent a bit of time in the primary school attached to my work (it’s a P-12 college) and a young girl asked me if I was ‘the one who wrote that book’, and I got to say yes! (after I checked that she meant Albert the Great Australian Dragon and not the adult book about a drunk guy seeing dead people!) We had a cracking chat about talking dragons after that.

Look, I’m not saying I’d turn it down if an agent decided to start a bidding war with the Top 5 publishers and it crept into six-digits, but I am genuinely content carving out my own little corner.

Thank you to everyone who has come along for the ride. I can’t promise riches, but I can promise some ridiculous stories.

Cheers!

The Sluagh Sidhe

One of my all-time favourite fantasy novels is The Sword in the Storm by David Gemmell. It is a wonderful alternate historical fantasy about the Rigante tribe facing off against the ever encroaching armies of Stone.

For the historical buffs, yeah, you’re just one letter away from Brigantes and Stone is… drum roll, please… Rome.

But the story is superb and the folklore Gemmell weaves throughout is amazing. In particular, I always loved the Sidhe; a strange, mythic race connected to the land. Not quite fae, definitely not human, but something else entirely.

And now I find myself, thirty years later, putting my own spin on familiar legends. My latest book is an idea I’ve had rattling around the old noggin for about ten years. It started with a simple idea and then a title.

The idea: what if the Roman Ninth Legion did indeed vanish…and the children were left behind?

The title: The Children of the Ninth.

That’s all I had. Literally the idea and the title. I thought about it on and off for years… particularly when we spent a fair amount of time pratting around on Hadrian’s Wall in 2018/2019.

Various iterations (in my head) involved dragons, time travel (thanks, Doctor Who!), underground civilisations, and good old-fashioned brutal warfare, but I never put pen to paper. Until last week.

Last week I started writing. No plan. No idea beyond the basic premise and a nagging thought it should be geared as a middle-grade horror (because there’s very little out there between Goosebumps and Stephen King…and kids love scary books!) I spent bloody ages picking out cool Roman names for my characters then I killed one of the buggers in the second chapter! I genuinely have no idea what I’m doing.

Today, I hit eleven-thousands words and the Bean Sidhe made an appearance, which is really cool because I didn’t know what the hell that was this morning. I just wrote a creepy old hag into the story and then I did some research on Scottish mythology and folklore. The creepy hag became the Bean Sidhe and now she’s about to summon the Sluagh Sidhe, which means ‘host of the sidhe’ or sluagh na marb, ‘the host of the dead’.

These are dislodged souls, or the unforgiven, and they tend to attack in a great flying crescent-shaped horde. I don’t know what I’m going to do with them, but it’s going to be fun finding out.

What was perhaps even more fun finding out was the origins of The Sidhe in one of my favourite novels. I mean, I probably should have known, but until a few hours ago I thought Gemmell himself made it up. Silly me. I’m a little bit disappointed he didn’t use the alternative spelling though.

Sith really has a ring to it.

I wonder if anyone has used that before?

Thanks for reading folks x

The one about simultaneous submissions

After the recent news that my book, Rock Zombie, lost its publisher (due to the publisher ceasing to exist and annoyingly not rising from the dead in a blaze of ironic glory) I am back submitting. Any writer will tell you that this is far from a fun process. It isn’t just the hard work of getting your synopsis, cover letter, bio, comparable titles, elevator pitch, and, you know, novel itself polished and ready, it’s the anticipation… the hope… the f*cking never-bloody-ending wait for a response! It takes a toll. Not to mention of course how utterly bizarre it is to have people read your work in the first place.

Everyone, please read my stories! Except, sort of don’t. It’s weird.
Writers

What you might not know if you haven’t put yourself through this particular wringer, is the added little addendum many publishers have in which they stipulate they will not accept ‘simultaneous submissions’. This means that if you submit your work to them you are doing so in the understanding that you are submitting only to them.

I guess I understand the reasoning; that if a publishing house goes through all the trouble of reading your work, liking it, debating it, deciding to publish it and then putting together an offer only to be told you’ve gone elsewhere, that could piss people off. But, honestly, it strikes me more like that one girl in high school who kept you on the line just enough to offer a glimmer of hope in a boob-filled future only for you to find out years later you never really stood a chance in the first place because some b-list celebrity came along and wrote a kids book/had a car with a CD player.

I might be mixing my metaphors here.

I think I have some issues.

Well, that is true… which is why I never submit to publishers who stipulate no simultaneous submissions. I received a form rejection recently that was for a book I submitted so long ago I actually forgot which one it was. I had to go back through my spreadsheet to find out. Sixteen months it took to get a response! Sixteen! Can you imagine waiting sixteen months on one submission and then going again?! Nightmare. And there are so many publishers you never hear from at all. That’s fair, that’s the game, but one at a time can go for burton.

However!

And it’s a big however entirely deserving of the line break, centre-justification, and bold text… when I created a list of potential new publishers for Rock Zombie there was one that rose above the others, and though they didn’t stipulate no simultaneous submissions, they did mention they have a 21 day turnaround. Twenty-one days is far more manageable than sixteen months, and I really like them, so this one time only I submitted to just the one place. And now we’re on the twenty-first day (not accounting for time difference) and I haven’t heard anything, so I’m experiencing a little microcosm of the whole process. It’s lovely, I tells you! Just lovely! Gotta dig that hope!

Ah, what am I complaining about? I know the drill, I’m an old-hand at this now. I’ll be a little disheartened if I hear nothing at all, that’s true, but then I’ll just get on with it. Roll the dice again.

I love Rock Zombie. I think people will get a real kick out of it, and the honest truth is, I really want to submit it to the amazing publisher of The Book and the Blade, but as Parliament House Press have signed four of my books already and I submitted a fifth a few months ago, I think I might be pushing it! 😀

So, if the phone doesn’t ring tomorrow, I have a top ten list of contacts I’ll be sending Rock Zombie off to later in the week… but this time I’ll be sending them all together… because sod no simultaneous submissions.

And clearly, the fact that this is the second blog post in as many days means I’m totally not dwelling on it at all. No, not even a little bit.

Cheers!