A little bit more info about Rock Zombie. To start with, here’s every author’s worst nightmare… the blurb… Hey, you painstakingly wrote, edited, polished, cried, and bled over 60k words… now summarise it in 50!
“Tonight, Matthew, I’m going to be… Kurt Cobain!”
Robbie Neville’s big break on Stars in Their Eyes was supposed to launch him into rock stardom.
Instead, it launched him into the afterlife.
Rob is dead. But his body didn’t get the memo.
Now he’s spending Saturday night trying to stop his reanimated corpse from kickstarting a zombie apocalypse… which is really hard to do when you’re a ghost.
With enough 90s nostalgia to make you dig out your old mixtapes, follow Rob (both of them) as he faces down hungry zombies, scared scallies, horny barmaids, and the ultimate question:
Can you still become a rock star when you’re dead?
Rock Zombie is a bad-taste, grungy, comedy/horror, set in the ’90s about a wannabe rock star who dies and comes back as a ghost while his body reanimates as a zombie. That’s not a spoiler, not really, it can’t be when the main character dies in the first few pages!
This book is a love-letter to ’90s culture; the music, the films, the TV shows, books, games, and comics… the whole scene… everything that influenced me when I was a teen.
The story is short and fast, and follows the ghost of Rob as he tries to stop his body from kick-starting a zombie apocalypse in his home town. Each chapter is named after a well-known song of the time, which you may have noticed if you’ve been following my social media… I’ve cheekily been posting a chapter title every day since the start of the month. Don’t worry, it won’t give the game away.
Many of Stephen King’s books are based in Maine, the state in which he was born, and the small town setting works really well to give the reader a visualisation of the story. If you can picture yourself in the midst of the action, then it’s all the more effective. I’ve gone for that with Rock Zombie. But, probably, a little less subtle.
The events of my upcoming comedy/horror ghost/zombie book take place in the town I grew up in… Redcar, on the north east coast of England. The streets are real, the places are real, but the people aren’t. I have to be very clear about this at the outset. In fact, at the very front of the novel you’ll come across this Author’s Note:
This novel is set in a real town… my hometown of Redcar on the northeast coast of England. All of the pubs, clubs, parks, squares, streets, shops and side-alleys described are very real places and many still exist today (or they did in the ‘90s when this story is set). In fact, you could quite easily walk the route the characters take and stop in for a drink, a dance, a play, or something to eat along the way (if you do, please take photos and tag me in them, that would be excellent!) Despite the real locations, the characters are all entirely fictitious. Every teenager, barman, waitress, copper, soldier, drinker, dancer, raver, bell-ringer, priest, butcher, baker, candlestick maker, zombie, and ghost is a product of my overactive imagination. Any resemblance to real people, living or dead, is purely coincidental. This silly story is a bit of a love letter to the ‘90s and, as such, it contains references to many TV shows, movies, characters, bands, and songs from the era. Every chapter is the title of a song, but no lyrics or quotes are reproduced anywhere in this novel, except for those that are in the public domain.
The inherent problem of setting stories in real places (which most of mine are) is the risk that a character might appear to be based on someone real. If I have a scene in a pub, for example, and the pub is real, but I make the landlord a bit of wanker, I have to be really clear that, ‘this is not based on the actual landlord of that pub.‘ I even have a similar statement on the copyright page… not that the landlord might be a wanker, but that, if he is, it’s purely a coincidence.
It’s a fine line to walk but one that I think is worth it, as it adds an essence of realism to the stories, and, let’s be honest, a story about a ghost and zombie probably could do with a little added realism.
There will be parts of this story that Redcar locals might read and go, Oh, yeah, that’s familiar, but if I’ve done my job properly, that should be the case for everyone.
This Friday – yes, Friday the 13th! – I’ll reveal the cover and the blurb! If you’d like to be involved in the cover reveal there’s a sign-up form on my social media stuff.
Or, more accurately, I’m up to something. If you see a little red-headed blue fella anywhere on my website, he’s worth a poke. If you do happen to give him a nudge, you’ll find yourself magically transported back in time (or to another page, but what is life without a little whimsy?)
Here you’ll find something that looks a bit like this…
It should be familiar to people of a certain generation and a quick look around this faux-MySpace page will drop one or two more clues for upcoming shenanigans.
For the next [insert length of time] I will be making daily TikTok, Reels, and videos on Stories, plus Instagram posts, Facebook posts and the occasional blog post here.
Some of you already know what I’m up to (because you’re involved in one way or another) and I hope you enjoy the ride.
I really like Amanda Palmer. She appears both genuine and nuts in equal measure, which is a superb combination. I first came across her on Twitter (before it became a cesspit of hate and ignorance) and I was really drawn by her TED Talk called ‘The Art of Asking’. Being British, I’m not exactly tip-top at asking for help, and there’s a point in the video where she mentioned a member of a support band feeling uncomfortable because it ‘feels like begging.’ I get that. That resonated with me.
But then I’m also reminded of my mate Grant who talks about the community of writers, and artists, and creatives. Grant kick-started the Brisbane Writers Crew meetings a few years ago and a group of us catch up every month to drink coffee/beer and talk all things creative. I’m still very much a newbie because my attendance it pretty piss poor but It’s amazing. I’ve met some lovely people there and many rocked up to my debut book launch (which also happened to be my 40th birthday!) and it was a great time.
Things like that wouldn’t happen without other people.
And I think that’s the point of Amanda Palmer’s video/philosophy (to my shame, I am yet to read the book – The Art of Asking – though it is sitting on my shelf). Isaac Newton said he saw so far by ‘standing on the shoulders of giants‘ and Tom Hanks attributed all his success to ‘his wife, family, friends, and colleagues.‘ All of my books are dedicated to people who have helped me, and my wife, Kel, is at the absolute epicentre of all of this. None of it would have happened without her. Stephen King wrote, ‘whenever I see a first novel dedicated to a wife (or a husband), I smile and think, There’s someone who knows. Writing is a lonely job. Having someone who believes in you makes a lot of difference,‘ and I am beyond lucky (and grateful) to have people who support and believe in me.
So, I’m about to do something that really puts me a little out of my comfort zone. I’m going to ask for help.
On the 31st of October this year (yep, Halloween!) I am going to self-publish one of my novels. This one is ridiculous, and silly, and gross, and perhaps bad-taste, and probably a little funny, and maybe even with a smidge of heart in certain places, and I can’t wait for people to read it. I’m not doing crowdfunding or anything like that (I’m still steeped in Britishness when it comes to that sort of thing), but I am going to ask people if they would kindly share things…
Starting in September, there will be book announcements, cover reveals, blurb reveals, calls for ARC readers and reviews, and a few other bits n bobs that I’m playing close to the chest for now… but I’m hoping the next two months will be really fun, and that you might come along for the ride.
The book in question has had an interesting history… it has been signed by two publishers in the past but never quite made it over the finish line (one went bust and one wanted me to take out all the swearing) so I’ve decided to roll the dice and give it my best shot.
So, I guess ‘ask #1’ is – ‘do you have any advice?’ 😀
Thanks for reading, watch this space!
(As I sat here and wrote this, my lovely wife is on the seat opposite me reading through the final edition of the book. She’s amazing!)
Well, what a week it has been! My second novel, The Sword and the Hounds, was published on the 23rd of July and got shared around a bit on social media by some amazing and lovely people, though from my end, it wasn’t quite the all-singing, all-dancing affair I had in mind… largely due to my youngest kid being a bit unwell. I had every intention of doing… something, but the day itself sort of went by in a bit of a blur. I walked the dog as I normally do, talked some bollocks on TikTok as I normally do, replied to some lovely messages, got ready for work… and didn’t go.
So, it’s book publication day, you find yourself off work because your boy is poorly, what would you do? That’s right… I spent the entire day sitting in front of a fire, editing a novel, and making plans to self-publish at Halloween, but that’s a different story for a different time (literally). Back to the week that was…
MY BOOK IS PUBLISHED!
I am absolutely over the moon, although I’m still yet to receive my six-figure contract and movie deal, which is a bit strange. I think the postman might have lost it.
I am, however, eternally grateful for the amazing support I have from family and friends… and some lovely people I’ve only ever ‘met’ online. The Sword and the Hounds has been really well received… by those able to get access to it. Because that has been a nightmare!
You may have heard that Booktopia (the biggest online book shop in Australia) collapsed and Amazon pounced on that news in the only way Amazon knows how… by cranking the price of small press and indie books in the Australian marketplace. That was gutting… to see my little novel priced so high and knowing what that means. And there’s nothing I can do about it. My lovely publisher was just as shocked as me. So, I spent the first few days after publication trying to find anywhere that might sell my novel and not rip people off. Thankfully, there are a great number of really cool independent bookshops who have the book listed online so all was not lost.
And then… drum roll… W.H. Smith listed it on their website! I was gobsmacked! Smiths is an institution of the British high street! I boasted all over the place about that one… and then it got taken down! I have no idea why. It came, it went, it came back again, my sister ordered it, it went again. Whether or not my sis ever gets her hands on the book remains to be seen! (sorry).
But speaking of Smiths… I got talking to the manager of the branch in Richmond (where the book is set) and he is going to try and get it on the shelves there. THAT is amazing! I told my mam (I was ‘fizzing up and busting’ as she likes to say) and she told her friends… the wonderful ‘Stray ladies’ (best not to ask). One lovely lady, Janice, even went to look, bless her, but it was only a few days after publication and not in stock. I don’t know if that one will eventuate… but if it does, I’ll be begging people to take photos of my book on the shelf! That will be a dream come true.
After that, I spent a good few hours (and god-knows how much on the phone bill) calling other UK bookshops… with zero success. One guy told me he receives between 3-4 thousand requests a month! That’s insane… and a bit of a kick in the tits… but I guess I can’t feel too bad about it.
On day three, the Kindle version of The Sword and the Hounds climbed the charts in ‘Ghost Horror’ on the Australian market and hung around number 3 for a very short while… that was utter magic, and so I made a load more phone calls trying to ride on the coattails of that momentary success… again, no luck 😀
On day four or five, my Goodreads account got hacked… or a gremlin was let loose, I don’t know. It was a bit of struggle getting that sorted, but when I did (thanks to the wonderful ‘librarians’ at Goodreads) I found some reviews sitting there for the new book! 2 x 5 star and 1 x 4 star! Magic!
My lovely (and patient) wife organised a book launch and I sent the wrong date out to everyone at work. I then sent them all another email with the correct date. And then a few days later I cancelled the whole thing. To tell the truth, I don’t really know why. I think the first one was such a huge moment for me that I got into my own head a bit. Maybe something more low key might be in order this time round. We’ll see.
So, what else have I been up to? Well, I’ve spent countless hours trying to create ads for the book but all I’ve really ended up doing is scrolling through photos and videos of our time in Richmond and Yorkshire and giving myself crippling homesickness. That then leads to thoughts of moving back, which leads to thoughts of finances, which leads to thoughts of ‘well, if I sell a million books I won’t have to worry about it, I can just wander around Yorkshire like the next James Herriot’, which leads to thoughts of ‘you’re a dickhead’, so I distract myself with the Olympics, which leads to thoughts of ‘am I really this old?’. It’s quite the roller coaster.
BUT THEN I got in touch with an absolute legend on Instagram… one of my favourite accounts… and my publisher sent him my books! That’s exciting, and more than a little scary. Details to follow soon.
A few days ago, I had an interview with a lovely reporter for a local paper, which was fantastic. I haven’t really mentioned that to anyone (until now). I’m just going to see what happens when the paper gets put on the table in the staff room. I’ll keep you posted.
Me mam!
And over the last few days, those friends and family who ordered the book have started to receive it in the post and my inbox now has some cracking photos of The Sword and the Hounds out in the world… and like a crack-whore looking for a fix, I want more! So, I’ve been writing. And then I realise I’m ignoring advertising, so I go back to that, and I end up ignoring the writing and I get nothing done at all, and… , blimey, it’s noisy in here! Thank God for the Olympics and All Creatures Great and Small.
So, here we are… a week or so later trying not to metaphorically peer over everyone’s shoulder to see if they love or hate my book (and therefore, tacitly, me)…like some right needy dickhead! But there is a part in this story I just can’t wait for folk to read… especially those who read the first book and told me they liked a particularly character… something happens!
BLANK comes BLANK as a BLANK and BLANK BLANK BLANK.
If you crack my code, hit me up, I want to talk about it!
Thanks for reading folks! And thank you all for an awesome week.
I don’t often get asked why I write as people seem to be more curious about how. This isn’t a query regarding methodology or anything, they’re not looking for a pen or pencil, typewriter or keyboard kind of response, moreso a ‘where on earth do you find the time?’ That’s a fair question, but I think why is much better.
*insert needlessly melodramatic and intense lean forward, hand on chin, probably wearing a beret and looking like a twat moment here*
“I write because I have to”
(yeah, I definitely set myself to dickhead there, but bear with me)
My mind is like a bag of cats on nitrous oxide who are completely aware there’s a brick in the bottom and possibly a near future that involves water and isn’t very long. Even my intrusive thoughts have intrusive thoughts. And I don’t say this lightly. My wife tells me I overthink things other people don’t even think about. Although I should point out this came from a lovely moment of kindness … talking to the kids … “Your dad is the most fair man there is. He overthinks things I don’t even think of”. She’s the Chilli to my Bandit. Anyway, I just assumed everyone’s heads are this busy. As it turns out… some people don’t even have an inner monologue!
Mental. I have about four. And they’re all set to 11.
But I can drown it out. There are ways.
There’s the not-so-healthy mind-numbing scrolling through social media, there’s the definitely-not-so-healthy partaking of ample amounts of booze, there’s the actually-healthy-but-I’m-too-fucking-lazy god-awful exercise, and then there’s stories.
When I get into a story it’s damn near all I can focus on. I can dedicate myself to it… and yes, become slightly obsessed with it. But shaping a story, shaping characters, watching them grow and do things I didn’t expect, even though I’m supposed to be in charge… that’s magic. And then the rare occasion of eliciting a response from a reader… that’s an extra special kind of magic right there.
A lady wrote me a beautiful message this time last year complaining about a character I’d killed. Steve. (Spoilers, sorry). It upset her. The email was lovely. She was lovely. But what utter magic to have written something that can make people feel… to cry, laugh, get angry, scared, a little bit nervous about the kind of man they’ve married and got two kids with 🤣
When I’m writing, even the intrusive thoughts stop squabbling for a bit and pitch in with ideas.
So, how I write is whenever I can, wherever I can, on my laptop or in my notebook.
But why I write is because I have to.
It gives me an amazing sense of well-being, peace, and fulfillment. And there is something utterly magic about creating a story that didn’t exist before. It’s even more magic if those stories get shared… but that’s not the be all and end all. I have five complete novels and two novellas that haven’t been published or signed, and maybe they never will… but writing them was a dream. And so I’ll keep writing.
Okay, maybe it’s not because I have to… maybe that’s going too far… but it is healthier than falling down an angry rabbit hole watching tiktok videos of Karens arguing with the police.
If I write about the angry Karens… well, I can set the barghests and demons on them.
Well, it only took me the better part of 30 years, but I finished writing a novel today. To be clear, I haven’t been writing for 30 years, but when I tell the story of The Book and the Blade, I always mention how I initially got the idea when I was 18.
For this story, I’ve had the idea since I was 8! Today, I finished it.
To give this a little context, I couldn’t even read when I was 8, but my grandad had died two years prior and like many young boys in similar circumstances, I idolised him in ways I didn’t fully understand.
My grandad; the dog walking, pipe smoking, ever present war hero… was gone.
But his stories live on.
No one is finally dead until the ripples they cause in the world fade away.
Sir Terry Pratchett – Reaper Man
I’m 42 years old now, I live in Australia, and I tell my grandad’s stories constantly. It was about time I wrote them down. I carry his name, you see, passed down to me through my dad, his son. My own daughter and son carry his name also, and the shared names go back even further than those four generations.
But back to the point of this post, I finally finished writing a novel about him. Sgt. Alexander Bedair Finlayson.
Maybe.
I first announced I’d done this on 22nd October 2023… that was the day I completed the first draft. On the 6th April 2024 (two days before writing this) I finished… again.
The tricky thing about writing a novel about your grandad, when you’re named after him, is you can’t very well use your own name as that of the main protagonist. This isn’t primary school. And to make it even more complicated, I have used grandad’s name in another of my novels. He was a twin. And in the upcoming The Sword and the Hounds, Alexander and Archibald play a key role. So, I sort of shot myself in the foot there.
But the reality is, for some strange reason I don’t quite know, Uncle Arch used to refer to himself as Mickie Finn. When he wrote letters to grandad during the war, he often signed them in this way. So my main character, the one based on grandad, became Michael ‘Micky’ Finn. His brother in the story is called John (another name that runs through the family)… and strangely enough, Alexander and Archibald make an appearance as well.
You might be thinking now… if you’re of a deductive mind… that these few details would indicate I am playing fast and loose with ‘historical fiction’, and you’d be absolutely spot on. This story isn’t historical fiction, not really, it’s historical fantasy, and there’s a very simple explanation…
I’m a coward.
The truth is, I don’t feel good enough to write a straight war story about my grandad. I don’t think I could ever do it justice. I know I can string a few word together and occasionally pop out some entertaining bits and bobs, but this is my grandad we’re talking about! A man who left home just after his 21st birthday in 1939 to enter basic training, and was then shipped out a year later from Liverpool to North Africa. He wouldn’t return home for four and a half years! He fought in North Africa, Italy, Greece, and ended up in the LRDG! How the hell am I supposed to write about that?!
So I didn’t. I spoke to my dad, and I spoke to my uncle, and I basically asked for their blessing to write grandad’s story in a way I know how… with fantasy and horror. And it was this that ultimately made me throw out the first draft… and then it saved the fifth.
I started by moulding the story around Grandad’s Letters (these documents are fully deserving of the capitalisation). They are two long accounts of grandad’s experiences in war that he typed up for Major Forty, who wrote a series of books on the exploits of the 8th Army and the 7th Armoured Division. We have those letters, along with a treasure trove of photographs taken through the North Africa Campaign and beyond. I organised everything as best as I could in chronological order and then I started playing with it.
But there were too many influences. When I first started, I didn’t know what I wanted it to be. I devoured A.R. Channel’s The Fighting Four war novels when I was a kid, then moved up to Robert Westall. After that were Stephen E Ambrose and Ben McIntyre. I’ve watched just about every war movie and TV show you can imagine, from the romanticised movies of the 60s and 70s to the more gritty and realistic showings of Spielberg, Hanks and co. and I’m one of those blokes who is more than happy to watch a documentary on a Friday night (yes, I am that cliched). And, my God, I researched! I researched more for this novel than I did for my Masters.
But still, that first draft didn’t know whether it was coming or going! Was it aimed at kids, teens, war historians, or horror fans? It was a total mess… and the ‘horror’ was shoe-horned in to try and make the narrative flow. It didn’t work.
In the second draft, I found the voice and tone I wanted.
In the third, I discovered the plot (three drafts to find a plot!)
In the fourth, I ‘killed my darlings’, as the saying goes (and I’m left with a whole file called ‘dumping ground’)
And in the fifth, I found my story. Grandad’s story.
The tentative working title is Shadows in the Sand, but that might change. Right now, I’m exhausted. I’ve spoken to dad. I’ve spoken to my best mate. I’ve spoken to my wife. I’ve come out from under the rock and I’m going to let it rest. What the story needs now is fresh eyes… someone who can see if it works like a story at all.
The beta reading of this one is going to be brutal! I’m not sure I’m ready to let it go.
Either way, I did it. And I’m really proud I did it. Who knows… it might work, it might not. But I’ll push on regardless.
Good morning lovely people, and welcome to a random and unexpected blog post… my first of 2024, and let’s be honest, my first in a long time. This poor neglected little website does not get a whole lot of attention and I really ought to remedy that.
So, let’s recap 2023:
Reindeer Games did quite well in the Christmas of 2022 and so the start of 2023 saw a number of lovely reviews finding their way onto Amazon and Goodreads. That was awesome, and I’m incredibly grateful to everyone who read and supported my silly little Reindeer murdery self-published novella.
The Book and the Blade was released by Parliament House Press! My debut novel! A dream come true.
The book launch took place at Netherworld in Brisbane on my 41st birthday and we had an absolute ball! I met some amazing people there, including some lovely members of the Brisbane Writers Crew.
I actually managed to get to a couple of Brisbane Writers Crew catch-ups, which were great, but my attendance was pretty poor at best (not a fan of driving in the city!) I’ll attempt to fix that in 2024.
Albert the Great Australian Dragon – illustrated by the wonderfully talented Amy Carter was published at Easter.
The publisher who had signed Rock Zombie sadly pulled the plug (well… stopped being a publisher altogether!)
Book shop appearance at the excellent Highlands Books in Emerald!
Wrote two stories (and narrated them!) for Pleased! A Beatles inspired anthology edited by the awesome Gayle Ramage.
Had two stories published in the amazing Australian horror anthology, Nightmare Fuel, courtesy of the wonderful Emma Nayfie.
The opening chapter of my comedy/fantasy novel, Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Orcs?! was read out by the exceptional lads of The Failing Writers Podcast.
My Christmas ghost story, In The House of Trembling Madness, was also read out in the Christmas special of the same pod, thanks lads!
Impromptu book signing at Book Face Orion, Springfield!
Reindeer Games 2: Rein Harder with a Vengeance was released for Christmas and did quite well… though not as well as Reindeer Games 1 (for the second year running!)
The Sword and the Hounds cover reveal!
And I wrote three novels, two novellas, seven short stories, submitted to publishers twenty-one times, got four acceptances (short stories), twelve rejections, and radio silence from the rest…oh, and you know, went to work and earned a living and whatnot (plus moved house…and got bitten by a snake…and went through a tornado…but I did get a full size pool table for next to nothing so happy days!)
Damn. That’s a big year. So, what’s next?
Well, The Sword and the Hounds will be published in April, so I’m very much looking forward to that. If Rock Zombie doesn’t find a home by the middle of the year I’ve decided to self-publish it for Halloween. I wrote myself into a corner with Reindeer Games, so I’m going to have to write Reindeer Games 3: Sleigh by December. I’m also working on a series of Easter stories in the same vein, but that’ll be for 2025. This year I want to finish writing the ‘unnamed WW2’ novel I’ve had on the go for a year, create an Arthur Crazy graphic novel tie-in (to further explain an event that happens in The Sword and the Hounds), and get started on Arthur Crazy #5. I’d also like to find homes for The Dragoman and Won’t Somebody Please Think of the Orcs?! So, you know, nothing crazy 😀
One of my all-time favourite fantasy novels is The Sword in the Storm by David Gemmell. It is a wonderful alternate historical fantasy about the Rigante tribe facing off against the ever encroaching armies of Stone.
For the historical buffs, yeah, you’re just one letter away from Brigantes and Stone is… drum roll, please… Rome.
But the story is superb and the folklore Gemmell weaves throughout is amazing. In particular, I always loved the Sidhe; a strange, mythic race connected to the land. Not quite fae, definitely not human, but something else entirely.
And now I find myself, thirty years later, putting my own spin on familiar legends. My latest book is an idea I’ve had rattling around the old noggin for about ten years. It started with a simple idea and then a title.
The idea: what if the Roman Ninth Legion did indeed vanish…and the children were left behind?
The title: The Children of the Ninth.
That’s all I had. Literally the idea and the title. I thought about it on and off for years… particularly when we spent a fair amount of time pratting around on Hadrian’s Wall in 2018/2019.
Various iterations (in my head) involved dragons, time travel (thanks, Doctor Who!), underground civilisations, and good old-fashioned brutal warfare, but I never put pen to paper. Until last week.
Last week I started writing. No plan. No idea beyond the basic premise and a nagging thought it should be geared as a middle-grade horror (because there’s very little out there between Goosebumps and Stephen King…and kids love scary books!) I spent bloody ages picking out cool Roman names for my characters then I killed one of the buggers in the second chapter! I genuinely have no idea what I’m doing.
Today, I hit eleven-thousands words and the Bean Sidhe made an appearance, which is really cool because I didn’t know what the hell that was this morning. I just wrote a creepy old hag into the story and then I did some research on Scottish mythology and folklore. The creepy hag became the Bean Sidhe and now she’s about to summon the Sluagh Sidhe, which means ‘host of the sidhe’ or sluagh na marb, ‘the host of the dead’.
These are dislodged souls, or the unforgiven, and they tend to attack in a great flying crescent-shaped horde. I don’t know what I’m going to do with them, but it’s going to be fun finding out.
What was perhaps even more fun finding out was the origins of The Sidhe in one of my favourite novels. I mean, I probably should have known, but until a few hours ago I thought Gemmell himself made it up. Silly me. I’m a little bit disappointed he didn’t use the alternative spelling though.
Well, 343am to be precise. I’m wide awake. Again. It’s a relatively normal occurance but I am getting a little bored of approaching the wee hours from this direction. It was a lot more fun when I was a young man coming home, putting a pizza in the oven, and then promptly forgetting about it as I passed out on the couch. But now I’m just… awake… and thinking.
Here’s a list so far…
1) if the Ninth Roman Legion simply vanished overnight in mysterious circumstances and left all the children behind, what happened to the women in the camp?
2) is there a special place in hell reserved for vanity publishers who masquerade as traditional publishers?
3) what’s that sound?
4) why is that video of Tim Minchin’s Matilda set to Dragula so freaking good?!
5) how much horror is too much horror for middle grade readers? There seems to be a huge gap between Goosebumps and Stephen King, which reminds me of…
6) the time my wife and I were shopping for clothes for our daughter and Kel loudly proclaimed, “there’s literally nothing between princess and whore!”
7) why is an extremely old lady running incredibly fast towards you such a scary image? (Give it time)
And of course, the old faithful…
8) if I fall asleep now how much sleep could I possibly get before I have to get up and function?
A.B. Finlayson 